


Spaces in between insane and insecure

by Sunwarmed_Ash_tree_and_the_dreaming_Stag



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Because of the pretense for sex, Bottom Jonathan, First Time, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, No one is high during the sex, Season 1, Smut, Stonathan - Freeform, Top Steve, adderall, sex for drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-12 02:48:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15330075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunwarmed_Ash_tree_and_the_dreaming_Stag/pseuds/Sunwarmed_Ash_tree_and_the_dreaming_Stag
Summary: Jonathan can't sleep. Not when he knows Will is still out there somewhere. Steve has been supplying him with uppers for months but with Will missing he's been popping Adderall like tic tacs. When he finds himself in a desperate need for more, he visits Steve, hoping to work out a deal. Sex for drugs. Neither of them are gay so what's the harm. It's just business, right?(Saw this great picture of Charlie on Insta leaning up against a car and my friend Claudia said he looked like he was Jonesin for a fix. And viola this piece of trash was formed.)





	Spaces in between insane and insecure

**Author's Note:**

> This is all fucking Claudia's fault.

It was Friday night. The weekend was finally here and Steve was planning on another quiet, solo night at home. Maybe drink a few beers by the pool he never used anymore, or smoke a joint or two while he watched TV. Nice and simple. Though when was had his life ever really been simple?

Not twenty minutes later there was a knock at the door and behind was Jonathan Byers, looking worse for wear.  

“Byers? What the hell are you doing here man?” It was late, a quarter after midnight actually. Jonathan at least had the good forethought to look sheepish at that.

“H-Hey Steve,” he mumbled out awkwardly, eyes on his shoes. Byers never was one for eye contact. Made sense, just one more thing to add to his list of quirks that went with the title school freak. “Uh, how are you?”

Steve had to physically stop himself from rolling his eyes. “Byers, cut the shit. It's after midnight. I know you didn’t come here for small talk.”

Jonathan frowned but nodded before asking, “Do you have any more Adderall?”

Ah. _That’s more like it_.  

“I just sold you some yesterday.” He couldn’t be out _already._ Unless Jonathan had a serious drug problem no one knew about.

Jonathan’s lips pursed in a tight frown. “Yeah, I know. I need more.”

“What! I gave you 5 pills! How are you already-”

“Look!” Jonathan interrupted, temper heating up as he crowded Steve in his doorway. “My brother’s missing ok! And I can’t- I can’t go to sleep knowing I should be out there _looking_ _for_ _him_! My mom’s barely holding it together as it is, and I- I just _need_ to find him.”

Steve sighed with a heavy frown. The whole town knew about the younger Byers disappearance. It had been the talk of the town for days now. Hell it was the most exciting thing to happen in Hawkins since that bear destroyed Mr. Anderson’s new Buick 6 years ago.

Steve felt for the family, he really did. The Byers’ were the poorest family in Hawkins. Their dad was an abusive gambler who took out his frustrations on his wife and kids. Mrs. Byers divorced him last year, leaving her to work full time to pay off the mountain of debt Lonnie left in her name. As far as Steve knew, Jonathan was working too; the night shifts so someone was always home with the younger Byers kid. And now, as if they didn't have enough shit on their plate, Will was missing. Yeah, he felt for the family, enough that he had been supplying Jonathan stimulants for the past three months, but this week more than ever.

“How many do you need?” Steve asked finally, mentally calculating how many he had left. If Jonathan kept up his newest rate he’d have to steal a few from his mom’s stash. Though he doubted she’d notice, she was never fucking home.

“Um, 8?” Jonathan said and Steve’s eyes grew wide in surprise.

“ _8?_ Dude, how many are you taking!”

Jonathan's eyes lowered on Steve’s hard, angry and threatening. “Do you have them or not?”

Steve rolled his eyes and pushed the door open, expecting Jonathan to follow as he made his way into the large, empty house. He heard Jonathan’s light footfalls behind him all the way into his bedroom, stopping before the bathroom.

Steve knocked the small orange pills into his hand and counted out 8 before holding them out for Jonathan to take.

“Same deal as always, 10 bucks a pop.”

Jonathan tucked the pills into his pocket before settling his gaze on the ground, just barely looking up through his eyelashes. It was almost like he was attempting to hide behind his god awful hair. That sheepish look was back and it set Steve on edge.

“What is it? Come on, I don’t have all night.” Steve was beginning to lose his patience.

“I-I don’t have any money.”

Steve scoffed. “Then why did you even waste my time Byers! Give them back and get the hell out of my house.”

“Wait! What if we worked out a deal,” He pleaded, his eyes searching Steve’s face desperately.

“What kind of deal?”

When Jonathan didn’t answer right away Steve almost clocked him. He was getting tired, and this shit was getting old.

“Heellloo? Earth to Byers?”

“What if I let you fuck me?”

Steve recoiled like the man slapped him. “Wanna run that by me again?”

“Well I mean I know Nancy’s not putting out.”

“Excuse me?” _Who the hell did this guy think he was?_

“Nancy. Everyone knows the type of girl she is and the kind of guy you are.”

“The kind of guy _I am_ ?” _What the hell was that supposed to mean?_

“Yeah, the kind of guy who sleeps around. Doesn’t matter who as long as you get off.”

“Hey! I am _not-_ ”

“Yeah, you are Steve,” Jonathan interrupted, a light smirk on his face. It was a little unnerving. Steve didn’t think he’d ever seen the guy attempt to smile before.

“I’m not gay,” Steve said suddenly and Jonathan actually laughed.

“Neither am I. Listen, I’m not saying let’s make this a regular thing. You have something I need and I can give you something you need. It’s not really all that complex.”

Steve thought about it. He had been with Nancy a little over two months now and they hadn't done anything other than kiss. Hell they hadn't even made out yet. Their physical relationship was moving at a snail's pace, and it had given him a serious case of blue balls. He was getting seriously tired of his right hand. Besides, him and Byers weren't fucking for love or anything so it wouldn't count as cheating right? It's not like Steve was sleeping with another girl. Jonathan wasn’t gay and neither was he, it wasn’t attraction, it was just, _business_.

“So do we have a deal?”

Jonathan’s question brought Steve out of his thoughts and he was quiet for another moment before he nodded.

* * *

Steve expected the sex to be awkward, but to his surprise, Jonathan asserted more confidence now than he ever did at school. He was the one who initiated the kiss, backing Steve up against the bathroom door and capturing his lips with his own.

It was hotter than it should be, letting Jonathan take control like this. But once he started, Steve wasn’t going to stop him. Though Steve mentally wished he had taken those few hits earlier in the evening. At least then he could chalk the raging hard on he had for drug induced desperation, and not the feeling of Byers grinding solidly against him. Jonathan kept their lips connected the entire backwards walk to his bed, pushing Steve on his back before getting comfortable on top.

Steve would deny to the day he died the small whine that left his lips when Jonathan broke the kiss for air.

“Take off your clothes,” Jonathan said and it took Steve a moment for his brain to come back online.

“What?”

“Kinda hard to fuck with your clothes on don’t you think?” Jonathan chuckled and Steve felt his cheeks heat in embarrassment.

“Right, uh, okay.” He mumbled out stupidly, starting on his shirt since Jonathan was still straddled around his hips. By the time he had his shirt off, Jonathan was moving off him to yank down his jeans. How the kid managed to fit into jeans that tight he’ll never understand, but he tried to focus his attention on his own pants which seemed to want to stay on at the moment.

“Need some help?” Jonathan offered smugly and Steve sent him a glare, eyes trying desperately hard not to fall on the now completely naked form in front of him.

“No asshole, I got it,” he shot back in an attempt to deflect his nervousness and settled on just yanking them down instead. When he was finally equally as naked as Byers, Jonathan connected their lips again, and Steve’s minor panic was back. He _really_ should have gotten high an hour ago.

“So uh, how do we, I mean-” Steve asked when they broke apart again.

“It’s not all that different from fucking a girl, I promise. Just let me do all the work.”

Steve was sure Jonathan was trying for reassuring but it just made Steve feel stupid. He _knew_ he had more sexual experience than Byers, but then again, maybe not.

“Where do you keep your stuff?”

“Uh, side drawer,” Steve stumbled out and Jonathan nodded, removing himself from Steve’s lap to grab what they needed. Steve used the moments apart to focus on his breathing. He didn't know why he was freaking out so much. It was just sex. He’d had it dozens of times before. Maybe it was because he was fucking a guy. No, scratch that, it was because he was fucking _Byers_. Jonathan Byers. That had to be it.

When Jonathan returned, he tossed a condom on Steve’s chest, holding the small bottle of lubricant in his hand.

“Put that on,” he instructed and Steve didn’t see any point in arguing. Jonathan was calling the shots now. And as terrifying as that notion was, it was better than trying to fumble through this like some virgin. He had a reputation to uphold after all.

While Steve rolled the condom on, Jonathan was adding lube to three of his fingers. Steve raised his eyebrow in question.

“What are you doing?”

“What’s it look like I’m doing?” Byers laughed, moving his fingers behind him and sinking down on two of them with a gasp. “You think I’m just gonna let you stick _that_ in me without prep?”

“Uh, no, I guess not,” Steve said, but honestly, he had no idea. He was completely out of his element here. He didn’t know a damn thing about fucking another guy, but he sure as Hell wasn't going to say that.

Steve instead focused on what Jonathan was doing and found himself mesmerized by the show of Byers fucking himself down on his fingers. He’d never considered the notion of fingers in your ass to be pleasurable but Jonathan seemed to be having a good enough time, if the gasps and moans were anything to go by. Steve found himself getting worked up by it too. He had always liked it when girls made a show of playing with themselves for him, this was like that right?

All too soon Jonathan was back over his lap, slicking up Steve’s covered dick with more lube.

“You ready?” He asked and Steve couldn’t get his voice to work for the life of him, so instead he just nodded.  

Jonathan took control once more, moving Steve’s cock until he was in line with Jonathan’s hole and sunk down to the base in one smooth motion. The quick action pulled a pleasured gasp from each of them, but Steve practically groaned. Jesus Christ Byers was tight. Tighter than any pussy he’d fucked, and that included virgins.

He went to rock his hips upward, desiring more of the slick heat but a firm hand on his chest stopped him. He looked up to see Jonathan panting, eyes squeezed shut with a small grimace on his face.

“What’s wrong?”

“Just give me a second okay?” He said through clenched teeth and Steve felt a little guilty. He didn’t really think about how it would feel on Jonathan’s end. Steve could at least distract him in the meantime.

Feeling more confident than he had all evening, Steve wrapped a hand around the base of Jonathan’s neck, pulling him down slowly and connecting their lips together again. The kiss wasn't nearly as rushed this time, but still just as desperate and probing. This may be the only time he got to explore this side of Jonathan and he’d never been one to pass up an opportunity.

He had to hand it to Byers, the guy knew how to kiss. Every press of his lips or swipe of his tongue was met with just as much enthusiasm and skill as Steve’s own. It made him wonder if there was a secret side to Jonathan he never bothered to get to know before.

“I’m good, you can move now,” Jonathan panted into Steve’s ear, thin but supremely muscular arms on either side of his head. Steve swallowed nervously and nodded, resting his palms on either side of Jonathan’s hips before rocking upwards.

“Oh fuck Steve,” Jonathan gasped and Steve's fingers clenched on either side of sharp hips.

“Let me know if I need to stop okay?” Steve said because in another second he wouldn’t be able to think. Jonathan felt too good around him, tight and hot and perfect. It was taking every ounce of his self control not to flip Jonathan onto his stomach and fuck hard into that wet heat.

“No, no don’t stop,” Jonathan begged and that was all Steve needed to hear. Steve grabbed Jonathan’s hips tight and flipped them so Jonathan was on his back with his ankles on Steve’s shoulders. It was probably gay to say, but Steve liked looking at his partners when he fucked them. And this way he could take back a little bit of the control Jonathan had had majority of the evening.

“Is this still okay?” Steve asked and Jonathan nodded, his mouth open in pleasure.

Steve started a steady rhythm, not too fast but made sure to rock in deep. He made it a personal mission to bring out those soft gasps from Jonathan again. Turns out it didn't take very long, one shift in angle and Jonathan was practically screaming, digging his nails into Steve’s arms.

“R-Right there,” he begged and Steve sped up his thrusts, making damn sure to keep that angle consistent like his life depended on it. He was getting close already, which was embarrassing to his ego but the harsh pants in his ear and nails in his shoulders meant Jonathan was too. Steve bit hard on his lip to keep his orgasm at bay. He wanted, no _needed_ Jonathan to come apart completely under him first.

“Steve, Steve please,” Jonathan begged and Steve smirked, leaning down to connect their lips again.

“Are you going to come?” He purred against Jonathan’s neck and grinned when the younger man nodded. “Then come for me Byers.”

Jonathan dropped one of his legs from Steve’s shoulder and wrapped around his lower back, pulling Steve impossibly deeper and grinding back against Steve’s pelvis. Half a dozen thrusts later and Jonathan was arching, painting both of their stomachs with white hot pleasure, Steve’s name rolling off his tongue.

Watching Jonathan fall apart at the seams would have been enough for Steve to blow his load, but pair that with the even tighter grip around his cock and Steve was hurtling over the edge with a gasp, biting down hard on Jonathan’s shoulder to muffle his scream.

* * *

“So, I’m guessing that’s the first time you’ve ever slept with a guy?”

Jonathan was the first to break the post sex silence, taking one of Steve’s cigarettes off his side table and lighting it. He took a long, slow drag off the cigarette before passing it to Steve.

Steve took an equally long drag before answering. His nerves were fucking fried. Post sex was never this awkward, but he guessed that had more to do with who he just slept with, not the sex itself.

“Uh yeah, definitely. You?”

“Nope.”

Byers sucked casually on the cigarette, as if the question had been as mundane as if he’d ever been to Chicago.

“Wait, really?”

Jonathan just shrugged. “Well, I mean it’s the first time I’ve ever slept with someone for drugs but sleeping with guys kinda goes along with the whole gay thing.”

“I thought you said you weren't!” Now Steve was sitting up in bed.

“I lied,” he deadpanned, passing back the cigarette and blowing smoke at the ceiling.

“You asshole!” Steve let out a laugh, high and full of absolution. Of _course_ Jonathan was gay. Steve was such an idiot. “Why’d you lie to me?”

“Because I didn’t need you freaking out before we even started!” He laughed back, passing the cigarette back to Steve. “Besides, it wasn’t a big deal. Just two people helping each other out of a bind. And it worked in your favor. Doubt it’ll be a regular thing so why bother explaining.”

Steve was still slightly miffed they entered under false pretenses but he guessed Jonathan was right. It didn’t really make a difference either way now.

“Hey, you're not going to tell anyone are you?”

Jonathan shook his head. “No way. Don’t need the whole school finding out I’m gay. I’m a big enough freak as it is.”

Guilt flooded Steve’s gut at Jonathan’s self deprecation, knowing _he_ was one of the sole people responsible for Byer’s reputation as a creep. The kid hadn’t even done anything for Steve to label him as such. He was just different, quiet, and kept to himself. He was more of a target of convenience than necessity. He thought of the promise he made to Nancy at the beginning of their relationship, to try to be less of a dick all the time.

_“You don't need to be mean to get people to like you Steve.”_

Steve opened his mouth to apologize but Jonathan was already moving, pulling himself out of bed and grabbing for his clothes.

“Anyway, thanks, for the pills,” He said offhandedly, slipping the faded T-shirt of a band Steve didn't recognize over his head and heading for the door.

“Jonathan wait,” Steve said before his brain caught up with him, _what the hell was he doing?_

“Yeah?” Jonathan was probably wondering that too.

“Do you- Listen, I’m not doing anything the rest of the weekend. Nancy and her friend are out of town on a college visit. Do you want a hand looking for Will?”

“Yeah man, that would be great, thanks.”

The look of genuine relief on Jonathan's face when the two walked out the front door would stick with Steve an influence his behavior for a long time.  He may not ever be able to take back the damage he’d already done to Byers reputation, but this was a damn good place to start on the road to being a better person.

**Author's Note:**

> So? Whatcha think? Leave me a comment or if you want you can hmu on tumblr, @mrs-danny-gold


End file.
